Hello ….how are you today?

More often than not, in my professional practice and in my personal life, I hear the phrases “I'm exhausted”, “I can’t go on like this anymore”, “I'm overwhelmed”. It is the new normal, stress is the real pandemic.

I often think about the amount of pressure we put on our shoulders. We find it so difficult to relax. to find 10’ to meditate or half an hour to do something that nurtures our soul. I can’t help comparing our experience with a pressure cooker. I hope that we can start noticing that.

Learn more about the Reactive and the Responsive brain as well as 12 practices that will help you take a break.

You can listen to the podcast with this player, or if you prefer reading you have a written version below. Enjoy it!

The million-dollar question would be how much of what we do is proactive and how much is reactive. In states of stress like the ones most of us experience, what we do by default is to react. If we have a pile of emails, we reply to them as soon as possible. If we have calls from all fronts, we pick up our mobiles promptly. If someone tells us something that upsets us, we snap at them. We don't give ourselves time, we don't prioritize, it’s difficult to discern with that inner feeling of urgency. However, what would happen if we developed an inner presence that observed our present experience? What would happen if we took a few seconds to really think and / or listen before replying? What would happen if we favored what’s important and left what can wait for later? Better yet, what if we could pause and assess what we have to do taking an eagle’s view? This perspective is essential to be able to find clarity about our internal / emotional experience and what the outside world demands from us.

The reactive brain and the responsive brain

One of the people I feel the most grateful for and who taught me a lot is Ph.D Rick Hanson a referent in Neuroscience. He explains the difference between the responsive brain and the reactive brain. The reactive brain (amygdala and brainstem) is like the brain of a reptile. It seeks to avoid harm and protect itself. In contrast, the responsive brain (prefrontal cortex) is the mammalian brain that focuses on rationality and positive rewards. To explain this a little more, when we feel threatened from a child who cries and prevents us from working to someone who cuts us off in traffic, our reactive brain is activated and reacts by fighting or fleeing. This is instinctive and when it happens, stress related hormones are released. The problem is that after some time our reactive brain and stress hormones can be really harmful to our physical health. Nevertheless, we can learn to respond. Our most lucid essence is capable of recognizing what happens to us, acknowledging our experience without judging it, and choosing how to respond. This does require training and it’s completely worth it. That pause that we give ourselves between stimulus and response is what gives us power in the here and now, equanimity, and inner peace.

The fall (literally!) 🤸

Let's be honest, we all have long days where we don't know where to start. We all feel overwhelmed, irritated, and strained to a greater or lesser extent. If it's of any use to you, I was a worried woman. I used to juggle a thousand balls in the air. That gave me a false sense of success. I was killing myself to be able to deal with everything but as a result, I left my health on the way. Believe me, I suddenly started feeling so tired (despite sleeping well), so fatigued after a small effort, and so dizzy that one day on one of my walks something disconnected inside me and I fell face down on the ground. The only thing I remember is a couple helping me to get up and discovering I was covered in blood. My body had given me signals and I didn't want to see them until I literally fell apart. Fortunately, humans are resilient. As I got up, I thanked the couple who’d helped me and I walked slowly back home on my own. That day, I decided that I had to take the bull by the horns and heal myself. I needed to look at my discomfort in the eyes and see what it had to tell me. The message was loud and clear: TAKE A BREAK AND PUT YOUR MIND AT REST

12 pratices to take a break

What can we do to achieve that?

1. Breathe deeply. Inhale for several seconds through your nose and exhale until you feel like you've emptied your lungs. Deep breathing calms our agitation and connects us to our present experience.

2. Look at your reality from some perspective. Imagine looking at yourself from afar, you’ll discover how it broadens your view on reality. Many times, we’re so stressed that our vision is narrowed and we only see what we have in front of us.

3. Learn to set boundaries. These are a sign of self-care. When you say what you can and can’t do clearly, you’re choosing and respecting your health above everything else.

4. Meditate, pray, contemplate. You’ll find a few minutes of calm that will help you find peace of mind and also the ability to disengage from the false stories that you are probably telling yourself.

5. Talk to someone else, pour out what you have in your chest. This will enrich your views and if necessary, it will help you to question them.

6. Be self-compassionate. Speak to yourself as the wisest and most loving person in the world would.

7. Do physical exercise, sweat, release endorphins and hormones that contribute to your well-being.

8. Be grateful for all the good that happens to you and savor those experiences. So many times, we focus on what we don't like and we hardly pause to take in what we do.

9. Surrender and trust. I read once that there is only one source. You can align with it or not, but that source is unique and powerful. Some people call it God, others call it Universe or Energy. The best part is that it’s available to everyone.

10. Practice mindfulness. What do I mean? Pay attention to your present experience with interest, curiosity, and acceptance. This way, you’ll avoid misjudgments of reality and you’ll be able to choose how to respond.

11. If you need to cry, do it, and then go back to doing something that nurtures you. Nobody drowns in their tears, on the contrary, crying decompresses the chest.

12. If you need help to deal with what happens to you, ask for it. It’s the best investment you will make.

I’d like to round off with a few words by the famous speaker and author of “Dying to be me”, Anita Moorjani:

“If I’m stressed, anxious, unhappy, or something similar, I go inward and tend to that first. I sit with myself, walk in nature, or listen to music until I get to a centered place where I feel calm and collected. I noticed that when I do so, my external world also changes, and many of the obstacles just fall away without my actually doing anything.”

Anita Moorjani

I hope you enjoyed this blog / podcast. If you know someone who needs take a break, please forward this post to them and invite them to subscribe to the blog. This way, we’ll build bridges to help one another. It’s my mission to reach as many people as possible to offer them relief. Remember that you can also follow us on Apple Podcasts and Spotify as “Georgina Hudson Transformational Coach”.

A big hug❤